i believe in reincarnation

“The desert takes our men from us, and they don’t always return,” she said. “We know that, and we are used to it. Those who don’t return become a part of the clouds, a part of the animals that hide in the ravines and of the water that comes from the earth. They become a part of everything . . . they become the Soul of the World.”

-The Alchemist

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FML

when you start

falling

in love

it’s so hard

to fall asleep.

 

the warm light

birthing from my chest

spreading all the way

down to the ends of my toes

is a sunrise

in the middle of the night.

 

I bury my face

in my pillow

basking

and squirming

in the muchness

of it all.

 

 

it’s a whim of wonder,

a feeling I had forgotten

and

a sense of shame,

for being all consumed.

 

I lie awake

dreaming of all the things

that might be said

but mostly

I lie awake

terrified

because I’ve placed the power

in your eyes

and now you can truly hurt me.

across the ocean

sometimes

i just want to hear your voice

and those rings

those rings

feel like a snail

through molasses

and even though you

always

call me back

as quick as drunk man’s ear

hits his pillow

those rings feel longer than a lifetime

because the sound

of your voice

fills my heart

more than a thousand lifetimes could

and when I hear it

I know

you hear me

and I know

I am home

 

brooklyn 2016

 

 

risk

standing on the edge of a cliff
one step away from chance
high above it all

what if I jumped?
the power of a free fall
the rush of loss of control

will I be caught
by pillows of smooth skin
and gentle whispers

or will I crash to concrete
and be left lying with broken limbs
unable to lift my head to the sky

peering over the ledge
in the space of a decision
not yet in full fruition

fuck it,
I’m jumping.