you look in awe

not of me

of that I’m not her

and you’re happy


But it’s not me

I’m just a novelty

to you

and to many


But novelties fade

awe dissipates

you’ll leave full

and I’ll be empty


Getting over her

through me

And you’ll never have

to get over me.


I’m just a novelty

brooklyn, 2016



So many almosts.

Fuck almosts.

But the pain of an almost is always better than the easy void of a not at all.

The day I choose the certainty of a not at all over the risk of an almost is the day I allow my youth to crumble.

My youth will never crumble.

I might live a life full of almosts, or maybe, one day, an almost will cease to be an almost and we’ll be there.

And it will be worth every other almost.

But fuck almosts.

brooklyn, 2015

platonic soulmates

do you believe in platonic soulmates? because I have one. it’s a CONNECTION, not as intense or maybe as deep as a romantic connection, but a connection with someone who you feel like you completely get and who completely gets you. it’s a constant thing that is there, that I don’t even have to work for, or even think about. the feeling that I could skype her at any moment, any mood, after any life event and she would always say something that I love and understand. sometimes with LOVE it’s the intrigue, it’s the wonder of how someone is who they are that draws you in, that creates infatuation. this is not that. it it a complete understanding of her soul and who she is. it’s not that we’re the same either, we’re both dynamic, exciting people living very different lives, but again it’s just a constant undeniable link between us that never need questioning or the beautiful, yet sometimes exhausting, labor of love.

I love her so much. not a romantic love where I pine for her everyday or feel like life sucks when we’re not together. it’s a love where I’m just so incredibly happy she EXISTS. even if we’re separated by countries and oceans, there is someone in the world who completely and absolutely GETS me. and that makes me feel incredibly less alone.


new york city, jan 2015